One year ago today...

One year ago today, and I can't believe that already it's so long ago, I came to Sweden to visit Heli, as part of a two week European tour visiting Stockholm, Amsterdam, Barcelona, and a failed trip to Andorra. A year ago if you'd told me that now I'd have been working full time in Stockholm for several months, that I'd live in a part of southern Stockholm I'd never even heard of at that point, I'd have a Swedish phone number and bank account, and would be semi-fluent in Swedish I'd think it was ridiculous! A year ago I went alone to a supermarket here to buy something to eat, and had to look at products with Finnish text on the packaging to be sure of what it was! A year ago I asked Heli to write down for me the Swedish for asking someone if they spoke English, and it took a couple of days of encouraging myself before I even managed to say those three words!

A year ago I was a bit fed up and frustrated with London, and decided a holiday would do me some good and get it out of my system. I didn't expect the opposite effect. I'd thought of how one day moving to Stockholm might be nice, but was not taking the idea seriously at all. I just expected to have a nice few days with my friend here before moving on. But over a few days, starting with National Day, which is this Saturday, I decided that actually I really wanted to come here. And why wait? I felt there was no reason that I had to live in London or England. And by the time I left Stockholm for Amsterdam I was heartbroken to be leaving, and was determined to be back soon. Here I am still.

Things have certainly not gone quite to plan. I rushed, thinking I knew it all about emigrating because I managed in Finland, didn't give myself enough time, and left in September after a few weeks because I really wasn't happy without my boyfriend. I didn't expect to go back to England for a few months, and it was frustrating at the time, but actually it was also a really happy time that I'm glad I experienced.

This time round has not been without problems, but has definitely been more successful. As my boyfriend pointed out yesterday, I have managed. I have made a life. I have a house, a job, and many more friends in Stockholm than I had a year ago. I know more than I did a year ago. It's not been easy all the time, but I've learned a lot.

I'm starting to feel quite ready to leave Stockholm now. It's a beautiful place, and I think an experience like this is always valuable, but Stockholm isn't the one for me. I would certainly still visit in the future, there are many people and places here that I want to see again. I have no definite plans for when I will leave, but I know I don't want to stay here long term. Just like in September, I'm not as happy as I could or should be.

It's strange to think that a year has passed since this all really began. And actually I think that the last year has been one of the most exciting and special years in my life, despite the ups and downs, for both reasons relating to Stockholm and reasons relating to other things. It's not been perfect, I'm not happy all the time, but it could certainly be worse. I'm not sure how much more time I have here, but I'll be sure to appreciate the time I do have until it's over.

Super amazing news!

I have some wonderful, joyful news! After an absence of almost 3 years, which I can't quite believe, I am going to Turku! In just over two weeks I'll be getting the ferry to Finland for a few days, and I really am so happy. I had had it in the back of my mind since I got to Stockholm that I should travel there, but hadn't got to it. Then I had a message on Friday from one of my Finnish friends asking when I would come back, and now it's happening! I really hope it hasn't changed too much, my friend Emmi who I met in Turku but now lives in England goes back to see her family now and then, and has mentioned some things about it to me, but I really cannot wait to be back there myself.

However, I must say that my first experience booking with Viking Line has been fairly ridiculous - much more hassle than it needs to be, and both Finnish and Swedish friends who I've asked have told me that they also think the website is terrible.

It's not user friendly - the Swedish site is only available in Swedish, which is ok, but if I'm spending money I often prefer to use a website in English so I have no doubt over what I'm doing. I certainly don't think that services in this country should have to be available in English, and I've been critical of others I've met who expect this. Anyway, I spent all of yesterday attempting to buy tickets, using two different computers, my phone, two different cards - both of which had sufficient funds to make payment, and only ever received error messages. I thought it might be my error as I'd been providing my Swedish address, but my cards are registered to my parents' address in England. I tried their address, that didn't work either! Something that should be so easy was causing me so much stress.

This morning I called their customer service team to try to make the purchase over the phone. The lady I spoke to was helpful, but once she'd made a booking for me she instructed me to go to their website to make payment, which was the problem in the first place! She then tried to make a payment over the phone, the card still didn't work! Maybe their system dislikes cards from outside of Sweden, but I told her it was a UK card and she didn't mention that they didn't accept this. They make reference on their website to ID requirements for non-Nordic citizens, and I would think that for people who are travelling using the ferry would be quite a good option, so I really don't see why a card from another country should cause such problems. 

After payment failed yet again she advised me that I could pay when I check in, and just needed to take my booking number. This is fine for me, but as this has been such a hassle so far I'm anxious that something else will go wrong and my booking will mysteriously go missing or something like that. In fact, I will need to call them again anyway, as when I entered my booking number and name into the website to check that everything was correct the message advised that the name did not match the booking number. I appreciate that my name is unusual for English people, let alone a Swedish person, and the lady I spoke to probably just misheard me or made a typo, but the whole thing is not filling me with confidence.

So in conclusion I'm very happy to be going back to Turku after quite some time, I really cannot wait to see my friends there again, but I'm not impressed at all with Viking Line, to the point that last night I wrote my first complaint in Swedish. Hopefully it sounded as effective in Swedish as in English, and hopefully my trip will actually be straightforward once I've solved the issue of what name they put on my booking. However, if there's a next time I think I'll use a different service, especially as no one seems to have good things to say about booking with Viking Line.

Good/bad/beautiful day

Tomorrow I'm off to London! I'm quite excited to go home for a few days and see my friends. I had today off as well, and it was overall a nice day, but as always, not without its ups and downs.

The good news - I went to SEB and managed to open a bank account! Now that I've got into the banking system here I have to say I find it absolutely bizarre. In fact, whilst many things here are not what I'm used to, this is the first thing I've found completely impossible to understand.

First off, I was confused by the fact that the nearest branch to me in Globen was only open for 3 hours every day. Nevertheless, off I went, and when I explained that I just want to receive my wages and pay my rent the nice man at the bank asked me how I'd get the rent money into my new bank account. I said I would get it from the ATM and put it in the account so the payment could be made, which seemed fairly obvious. He then told me that only one branch in Stockholm handles cash! But it's a bank!

Anyway, the one and only branch that handles cash is in Sergels Torg, and as I had planned to go to an exhibition at Kulturhuset anyway it was no bother really to go there as well so I opened the account. Incidentally, the nice man told me that his best friend is English and he thinks it's sad how much foreign people struggle here. He told me to keep aiming for that personnummer and things will be much easier. It's nice to know that the average Swedish person agrees that things are unreasonably difficult for those who had the misfortune to be born abroad.

The other odd thing about banking in Sweden is that there is no standard system for generating account numbers. Each bank has their own system. I was wondering why my landlord's bank account number is twice as long as mine, and upon googling how the number should look I found that every bank has their own system. You might get to understand what your own bank does, but for other banks it's guesswork. I find this completely baffling. 

Then my day took a turn for the worse. I went to Sergels Torg, and knowing that the maximum amount you can withdraw from an ATM is 2000kr, I planned to use an ATM a few times to get enough for my rent, and a bit extra for when my bank card arrives. It should be here once I get back from London. Sadly it was not to be. It seems 2000kr is the maximum I can take per day, maybe partly because I'm withdrawing from an overseas account. So I never actually got to the Sergels Torg branch, and still had to pay my rent with ridiculous fees from my UK account. My war with them about the fees is ongoing, but at least now my wages will come into my Swedish account and I can save a little more. It's still frustrating, but I know I've made a small amount of progress.

I felt sorry for myself for a bit, and then went on to Kulturhuset. I have to say I really like it there, and really enjoy their exhibitions. I'm also able to see exhibitions there for free - I'm 25 years old, and those aged 25 and under go for free. I happen to look a bit younger than I really am, and every time I've told staff I'm 25 and asked to go in for free they've never asked for proof, so I'm probably going to be 25 years old for a while.

The current show is called "Asylum", and exhibits both art and fashion pieces. The theme seems fairly tentative in places, but there's a lot of interesting work there, and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed the mix of contemporary and older work, and there was work from less famous names, but also artists such as Salvador Dali. It's a really mixed show. The media is also very mixed - film, fashion, and sculpture. It's pretty broad so I think most people could take something from it, and for this reason I would recommend it.

After seeing the show I had some time to kill before going to the pub, so I went to the library and looked at the art section. I hadn't looked at this before, but I thought it was great. They have books in a variety of languages, there are comfortable places to sit, and they have a good range of books on art, fashion, photography, and design. I spent a while flicking through a really nice book about shoe design, it was quiet and peaceful, and I recommend it as a place to fill a bit of time.

So apart from one blip I had a pleasant day off work, and I'm looking forward to going on holiday tomorrow. It's getting late and I still need to pack my suitcase!

Staying still and travelling

Things have still been busy recently, but in more pleasant ways. I was offered an extension on my work contract, so despite the other things that are going on I'm going to stay put in Stockholm for now. It is difficult in some ways, but it's also so nice that I can still continue the experience I wanted to have of living here. Especially as spring is arriving and generally it's getting so much brighter here now.

I'm quite determined to stay occupied, to distract from the more negative feelings that come with staying here, and at the moment I have a few things coming up that I'm excited about. 

Tomorrow I'll be going to Krakow for a week for a work related trip. It's a bit nerve wracking, but I hope it will be a generally pleasant experience. I'm not sure how much time I'll have to explore Krakow, but hopefully there will be some opportunities for that. When I lived in Finland I considered visiting Gdansk purely because there was a direct flight from Turku, but other than that I've never really thought about visiting Poland, plus this only came up very recently, so it's a cool opportunity, and will definitely be an adventure.

I'll be travelling for most of tomorrow, so I have quite a few things I need to do today. Supermarket Art Fair is on today, and I hoped to go but I think it'll take up too much time, so as an alternative, I've found that Stockholm Art Book Fair, which I think is fairly new, is also on today at Spritmuseum in Djurgården, so I'm planning to go to that today. I've had so much going on that I completely missed that it was Stockholm Art this week - a bit disappointing.

The other thing I'm excited about is that in just under 4 weeks I'm going for a short holiday to London! I'm really looking forward to seeing lots of people who I miss, and I'm surprised by how excited I am to actually be back in London for a few days! I think it's a well-deserved reward after a stressful period of time. So although it's not perfect, I feel optimistic for the near future, and I'm going to make an effort to work more on this blog again, and in fact, to generally put a bit more into my creative practices.

A trip to Uppsala

Yesterday we went to Uppsala for a visit. It's possible to travel to Uppsala using a Stockholm travelcard, and just pay a 36kr supplement for crossing the county boundary. When I found out that the Uppsala train runs from Älvsjö station, which is 15 minutes walk from where we live, and that the journey only takes just over an hour, I really wanted to go. By coincidence, on Saturday I met someone who moved to Stockholm from Uppsala in December, so he was able to give me some suggestions of what to do there.
Unfortunately I don't think we chose the best day to visit Uppsala. I had been warned that there was a lot of snow this winter, more than in Stockholm, and whilst the weather in Stockholm yesterday was somewhere between snow and rain, in Uppsala it was very windy and very snowy. It wasn't the best day to be walking around outside.
It was also a bit difficult to get away from the cold, seeing as very few shops or businesses seemed to be open. Maybe Stockholm is a bit different to elsewhere in Sweden, and I took it for granted that everything would be open. The streets were so quiet too.

Regardless of this, I really enjoyed our visit, and I thought Uppsala was really pretty. The river there kind of reminded me of living in Turku - I'd love to see how it looks in the summer. We went to see Uppsala castle, which is up a very snowy hill with really nice views, and also visited the cathedral. I would seriously recommend visitors to go to the cathedral - it's very beautiful, with lots of tombs, stained glass, and interesting decorations. I noticed a large number of skull motifs in various places there, and also some sort of decoration that featured tall horns - not something you'd really expect in a cathedral. The decoration of the cathedral is so varied and beautiful; I found it quite awe inspiring. I think there is a lot that would appeal to designers and artists there.
Although the businesses that were open were quite limited, we did go into a small shopping centre and visit a very cool second hand shop, where you can either pay for an item entirely in cash, or pay less and give them an item you no longer want. I like rummaging in second hand shops so I thought this was a cool idea, I'd love to find somewhere similar in Stockholm, but if not at least Uppsala isn't far to go.
I also noticed a few colourful sculptures around Uppsala, and any form of public art usually appeals to me. Even though it was a very cold and dark day it helped to brighten things up.
I enjoyed our trip, and I'd definitely like to go again, preferably on a warmer and busier day. I'll look out for exhibitions at the art gallery there too, seeing as travelling is so cheap, easy, and convenient.
Maybe the weather in Uppsala was just a sign of things to come, as since yesterday the snow in Stockholm has been quite relentless. I started my new job today, so I no longer have the choice of staying at home avoiding bad weather! But I'd much rather have this step in the right direction than avoid the snow.

I'm coming back!

I am delighted to say that I will be back in Sweden this time next month! My boyfriend and I have our flights booked for 2nd January, and we've arranged a place to stay initially, again through Airbnb. I've definitely learned from past experience, and we've arranged a place to stay for 6 weeks. Hopefully this longer period of time will give us more success in finding somewhere more permanent to live. My time in England has been busy and has gone by quite quickly, and I'm so excited to go back to Sweden. The fact that this time round i won't be leaving my boyfriend behind makes a massive difference.
I'm also feeling a bit more confident, because today out of sheer boredom I looked back at some entries in Frozen In Finland. Some of the early entries I read mentioned feeling lost and confused, feeling scared, and feeling like a child because I struggled to do simple things without help. When I actually think back on my time in Finland I don't remember that - I remember being able to get along speaking Finnish, I remember being able to understand things and having confidence. This has reminded me that things weren't always like that there, and has reassured me that things can and will change for me in terms of my confidence speaking Swedish too. I also had a confidence boost after speaking to some Swedish people, in Swedish, online, and one person told me that at least my written Swedish was excellent. Mr Dictionary helped a bit, but that's ok.
My boyfriend speaks less Swedish than I do, so when we first get there I'll certainly be the more knowledgeable of the two of us, and this makes me more inclined to try, for both of our sakes. We'll learn together, and I've already concluded that I need to just try, be prepared to make a fool of myself, and keep going as much as I can, even if I feel shy or embarrassed. I can understand an awful lot, but there were occasions in September when I probably could have spoken Swedish but felt anxious that I wouldn't be clear enough or I'd make a fool of myself, so didn't even try, which I feel is totally the wrong attitude. For now, I'm more confident, and I hope that doesn't disappear the minute the plane lands. I can't wait to go!