The light burns!

Spring has certainly sprung in Stockholm! The photo was taken a couple of days ago at 10pm, and earlier this week I was woken up by daylight at 3am. I'm now making use of both blinds and curtains to block the light out.
Of course I remember similar things happening during the summer in Turku, but I don't remember it being quite so dramatic. Someone mentioned to me that Turku is on the edge of another time zone, I'm not sure if that makes any difference. I remember last summer when I visited Stockholm seeing the sun rise at 3am, and next week will be a year since that trip, so maybe I shouldn't be quite so astounded by it. But when I was here in September the daylight hours were shorter, and now I've seen the transition from winter when it was very dark for most of the day.
Unfortunately the change in light levels has disturbed my sleeping patterns a bit, and other people have also mentioned having trouble sleeping this week. Thankfully I now seem to be getting back to normal.
Due to the arrival of spring I've noticed more and more how the wildlife in Stockholm seems completely unfazed by the presence of humans. It's so normal to walk straight past small birds, getting very close to them, and they don't even seem to notice. In the winter I saw the occasional wild rabbit running around, but recently I've been seeing a lot, and although they are slightly more nervous than birds they also seem quite undisturbed by the presence of humans. In fact, I went to the park last Sunday with some friends for a drawing session, and there were quite a few rabbits running around. It was a beautiful warm day so the park was quite busy, but they were running around past groups of people with no care at all. I also saw a very sweet little boy chasing after a rabbit for quite some time - the rabbit could run much faster than he could.
This is quite alien to me as I'm used to being in London - I've seen a much bigger variety of birds here, and the rabbits are certainly new for me. In London you get the odd fox, and sometimes the soul destroying sound of foxes having sex, but that's pretty much it. I think the rabbits are nicer than the foxes anyway.

Valborg and a glimmer of hope

With the banking situation there is a small glimmer of hope. I looked at ICA Banken, which predictably did not offer an account without providing a personnummer, However, I came across a page (in English even!) on the SEB website about private non-resident bank accounts. There was an email address for enquiries, so I contacted them to see if they can offer something in my circumstances. They have a dedicated branch in Stockholm for non-resident accounts, and although the information on their website is quite limited I really hope it'll be a suitable option for me. It takes a couple of days to get a response, and today is a bank holiday, so hopefully I'll get a reply next week. I knew nothing about SEB and had never considered them, but my housemate told me they have a pretty good reputation.

If they cannot do anything for me then I suppose unfortunately I'll just have to accept these stupid charges from my bank in England, but that's not something I'll be doing happily, and will really be a big factor counting against me living in Sweden. It's really not unusual anymore for people to move between different countries and have interests away from their home countries, so I really don't know why the authorities can't collectively make it easier for people. As much as some people might not like it, immigration and globalisation is a thing.

The last couple of days have not been very nice, and I really can't promise right now how long I will stay in these circumstances. I'm feeling quite depressed. It's just over a week now until my holiday to London, and I think whilst I'm there I'll be seeing how it feels to be back and having a little think about the future.

   

On a slightly more pleasant note, today is May Day, and last night my housemates and I went to see the Valborg bonfire near to our house. This is also a holiday in Finland, but I missed it because I went on holiday to Norway at the time. In Sweden bonfires are traditionally lit to keep away bad spirits, and now it's officially spring. Although the sky looks suspiciously grey outside. The bonfire wasn't the most exciting thing in the world - it was basically that and some food stands in a field, but my housemates said it's more for the children and that the suburban ones like this aren't that big a deal. Still, I enjoyed being able to experience something from Swedish culture. I feel I'm a bit more detached from Swedish culture than I was from Finnish culture in Finland, mainly because my friends here are quite mixed, not just Swedish, and so there's less of an influence on me. It's kind of a shame, as I do want to learn and understand more here, so I'm glad I had the chance to see it, even if it wasn't the greatest spectacle.
Now it's a day off from work, which is something I certainly can appreciate, and I'm looking forward to going out tonight. I've definitely earned a few (many) drinks this week.

Balancing act

Yesterday we decided to explore our local area a little more, and went for a lovely walk by a very large frozen lake near to our house. It was so quiet and peaceful, everything so still. This is something I really appreciate about Stockholm after living in London for several years - there are so many quiet places here, even in central Stockholm there are areas where you can just sit in peace, and there's definitely nowhere like that in central London! I feel that Stockholm has a very good balance between liveliness, and more peaceful places. I had a chance to draw some pictures too - I haven't actually gone out sketching in a while, so that was really nice.
In the evening our flatmates suggested going for dinner at a restaurant they like very close to our house, so we did that and it was really nice. The waitress was so bubbly and cheerful, and repeatedly pointed out how young and beautiful I was, which I'm certainly not complaining about!

Since I found a job in this country I feel that balance is my biggest problem. Seeing as most emerging artists are obliged to support themselves with a day job I know that my problem is not unique, and it certainly isn't a new problem for me, it's been a constant issue in my mind since I graduated in 2012. However, up until now I was in London, where I had my life already set up, I had friends, I had plenty of art contacts, I knew my way around, and of course I was fluent in the language there! It definitely wasn't always easy to do everything that I wanted to, but I feel like it's much more difficult for me right now.
Whilst I was looking for work here I obviously had a lot of free time, and it was easier to do everything that I wanted to. Now I work five days a week, which I'm perfectly willing to do, but it obviously takes up a large part of my time. In the remaining time I have to try to fit in making art and looking for opportunities etc related to this, working on this blog and a novel that I'm writing, exploring my new home and getting to know Stockholm better, having a social life, which right now involves more effort because I don't know many people in Stockholm, so I need to make an effort to go out and meet new people, continuing to learn Swedish, and also having time to relax and have a private life with my partner.

Already I've had to really think about what my priorities are. Shortly before I found a job I got involved with a newly established advertising agency, who wanted a few hours of voluntary work per week, and were aiming for this to turn into full time employment for their volunteers in a few months time when they had a revenue stream. This seemed ideal whilst I was still job hunting, and I liked the prospect of this hopefully becoming a more creative day job in the future.
However, it became apparent that this would involve taking part in fairly long meetings on Saturdays, and that's not particularly appealing after working Monday-Friday. As I hadn't even started doing any work for those people, and already was struggling to fit everything in, having another commitment on my plate didn't seem like a good idea. I worried that doing this work to deadlines could mean that my own work would fall to one side, and that is much more important to me than working for free for someone else's benefit. So I dropped this idea, and I'm sure I'll feel pretty stupid if this company later becomes one of the biggest advertising agencies in the world. But I have to make my choices.
Recently I've started to become more efficient in a bid to fit everything in. I practice Swedish online on my way to work; if I have a little bit of quiet time at the end of the day I try to write if I can. I think the secret is trying to fit something in wherever possible - even five minutes is better than nothing at all.

I remember that an American artist I met during a residency in Iceland a couple of years ago told me that she tried to do small pieces of work, because it seemed much more manageable when she came home from working all day and then had to produce something. I've been keeping this advice in mind, because currently the main drawing I'm working on consists of lots of small drawings that will later be connected together to make a large scale piece of work. I think even aiming to work on one of these when I get home each day is a good strategy.
Stockholm is still new and exciting to me, so I'm obviously really keen to visit different areas and see new places, particularly galleries and art spaces that are brand new for me. At weekends it is really tempting to go out and explore, rather than concentrating on work or the more administrative side of my career. Perhaps I should keep in mind that we are not here for a short trip, we have plenty of time to go to new places, and we don't need to see everything this instant. I'm making friends and doing various things to help me meet new people, and hopefully when I have more of an established set of friends here, which is what is starting to happen now, things will be a bit easier. I hope that, as I settle more, and force myself to become more disciplined, it'll become easier to balance everything in my life.
Perhaps I also need to avoid beating myself up for not working or being active constantly, and keep in mind that I also need time to relax. Until I get to a position where a day job is unnecessary I think that this will be a constant issue in my life to some degree. I'm getting there, I'm making friends and art related contacts here, and my efficiency is definitely improving. Maybe I shouldn't expect to be superwoman. I think my life would be easier if we'd stayed put in London, but I'm certain my life would not be happier that way.

A lovely afternoon in Södermalm

As it was Valentine's Day yesterday we wanted to do something nice, so we decided to go to Greasy Spoon in Södermalm, which was recommended to me when I previously wrote about my desire for a vegetarian fried breakfast.

We got there around 2pm, and didn't think that it would be extremely busy, but maybe it's understandable seeing as it was both Valentine's Day and a Saturday afternoon.There was a one hour wait for a table, so we went for a little wander to pass the time.

Yesterday was really a beautiful day - the weather is definitely improving, and there's much more daylight now than when we arrived. We walked to the tip of the island, and from there we had beautiful views of Djurgården, Gamla Stan, and Skeppsholmen. It reminded me how beautiful Stockholm is, and I felt so lucky that I can live here and that our life here is starting to become more stable. We also walked to the Viking Line ferry terminal, so it amused me to see a street sign pointing to Finland. Now that I have an income I really need to look into the price of ferry tickets so that I can visit Turku.

By the time we'd had a walk for an hour we were so hungry, so back to Greasy Spoon we went. Actually getting food was quite a slow process because it was so busy, but I don't want to criticise the staff, especially the kitchen staff because they were putting food out constantly. The staff were all English, and automatically speaking English to every customer. I only heard Swedish being spoken amongst groups of customers. As it's clearly as English themed cafe maybe this added to the experience for non-English customers. The customer based seemed to be English people, and Swedish hipsters who probably think eating breakfast in the middle of the afternoon is edgy. I do actually find it a bit funny that this kind of food is a novelty here because it's the most normal thing in the world to me.

I like the way the cafe is decorated - the wallpaper looked like it had attractive scenes of London at first, but when we looked closer it actually showed scenes of gangs and police cars. I liked that - it felt more real to me, as someone who has lived in London for years, than having various tourist friendly pictures of Big Ben and double decker busses.

Eventually the food arrived, and wow, it was worth the wait!

Needless to say, this cafe is not a greasy spoon in the traditional sense. The ingredients and cooking were obviously of a much higher quality, and it may well be one of the best fried breakfasts I have ever eaten! Even now, the next day, I am still thinking about the food! Usually I prefer fried eggs to be more well-done, but these were actually delicious, and I say that their chefs are doing an amazing job. I also feel that you can't have a decent breakfast without some nice toast, and the toast here was just perfect, with lots of butter. Every single component was perfect, and I was so happy to find that the vegetarian sausages were Linda McCartney sausages. Maybe it's a bit sad that I knew that from taste alone. Fortunately, they're my favourite vegetarian sausages, and went perfectly with the rest of the food. I remember that the same sausages are available in The English Shop in Medborgarplatsen, and now I'd quite like to buy some to have at home. I've been to a limited number of restaurants in Stockholm, but for now I'm actually going to say that this is my favourite.

I'm not homesick, and I don't actually want to surround myself with purely British people and British culture here, but it was nice to be in an environment where my native language was expected, rather than potentially awkward. There seemed to be a sense of humour that's very familiar to me, the staff were lovely, the food was amazing, the coffee was very good, and it really did feel like a little piece of my home. They were playing English music from a cool jukebox, the cafe looks lovely, and I really enjoyed every part of our visit. I will definitely be going back there, and if I ever want some comforting food I think it's the obvious choice.

I would highly recommend Greasy Spoon. British people will love it because it's so comforting and familiar, I think for Swedish people it must be an interesting novelty. At least I know now how popular it is, and will maybe time my visit better, or at least be prepared for a long walk whilst I wait, as by the time the food actually arrived I was so hungry I could have passed out.

Friday night was the first night we'd spent in our new house, which we are so happy with, so overall yesterday was a really nice day. We're still exploring our new area, but there a more shops and businesses than there were in Hagsätra - so far we're really pleased. The flat is beautiful, and the two guys who already live here have been really friendly and welcoming to us. I think it's a really good thing that we now have the Swedish language being spoken in our home, so it's there all the time and hopefully this will help us both to keep improving.

My weekend is going very well, and I'm already looking forward to my next trip to Greasy Spoon. If they could start a home delivery service that would just be even better!

A trip to Uppsala

Yesterday we went to Uppsala for a visit. It's possible to travel to Uppsala using a Stockholm travelcard, and just pay a 36kr supplement for crossing the county boundary. When I found out that the Uppsala train runs from Älvsjö station, which is 15 minutes walk from where we live, and that the journey only takes just over an hour, I really wanted to go. By coincidence, on Saturday I met someone who moved to Stockholm from Uppsala in December, so he was able to give me some suggestions of what to do there.
Unfortunately I don't think we chose the best day to visit Uppsala. I had been warned that there was a lot of snow this winter, more than in Stockholm, and whilst the weather in Stockholm yesterday was somewhere between snow and rain, in Uppsala it was very windy and very snowy. It wasn't the best day to be walking around outside.
It was also a bit difficult to get away from the cold, seeing as very few shops or businesses seemed to be open. Maybe Stockholm is a bit different to elsewhere in Sweden, and I took it for granted that everything would be open. The streets were so quiet too.

Regardless of this, I really enjoyed our visit, and I thought Uppsala was really pretty. The river there kind of reminded me of living in Turku - I'd love to see how it looks in the summer. We went to see Uppsala castle, which is up a very snowy hill with really nice views, and also visited the cathedral. I would seriously recommend visitors to go to the cathedral - it's very beautiful, with lots of tombs, stained glass, and interesting decorations. I noticed a large number of skull motifs in various places there, and also some sort of decoration that featured tall horns - not something you'd really expect in a cathedral. The decoration of the cathedral is so varied and beautiful; I found it quite awe inspiring. I think there is a lot that would appeal to designers and artists there.
Although the businesses that were open were quite limited, we did go into a small shopping centre and visit a very cool second hand shop, where you can either pay for an item entirely in cash, or pay less and give them an item you no longer want. I like rummaging in second hand shops so I thought this was a cool idea, I'd love to find somewhere similar in Stockholm, but if not at least Uppsala isn't far to go.
I also noticed a few colourful sculptures around Uppsala, and any form of public art usually appeals to me. Even though it was a very cold and dark day it helped to brighten things up.
I enjoyed our trip, and I'd definitely like to go again, preferably on a warmer and busier day. I'll look out for exhibitions at the art gallery there too, seeing as travelling is so cheap, easy, and convenient.
Maybe the weather in Uppsala was just a sign of things to come, as since yesterday the snow in Stockholm has been quite relentless. I started my new job today, so I no longer have the choice of staying at home avoiding bad weather! But I'd much rather have this step in the right direction than avoid the snow.

An excellent 24 hours

Woohoo! The past 24 hours have been really good for me, but the biggest piece of news - I got the job! I start on Monday, and it's such a relief because this means that the biggest obstacle has been surpassed, and everything should get a bit easier from now on. Since going to Bazaren I've been feeling a bit more negative - there seemed to be an implication from some sides that Swedish people don't trust foreign people to do the job properly, and this worried me a bit, but now I feel so much better.
I'm sensible enough to realise that things will not automatically be easy from now on, but this does make a big difference. I now qualify for a personnummer, and can start looking for a place for us to live. I could have started that previously, but I do understand that not many people will be keen to rent to a couple who've just turned up and have no steady income. Kai is still looking, but having one decent income between us takes the pressure off a bit.The most important thing is that finding this job enables us to stay in Stockholm. After reading about so many negative experiences I did worry that eventually we'd run out of options. I would absolutely hate to have to go back to England, so I'm really relieved. I realise this is just a start for us, but hopefully it's a good sign for our future. I do feel more confident now that we'll be able to build a successful life here.

In my time job hunting I've noticed that Swedish people/companies are extremely friendly and positive in comparison to England - even rejection emails are so pleasant that you almost don't mind! I'm going to be working via a recruitment company, and the two welcome emails that they sent to me were so enthusiastic and friendly that I already feel comfortable working with them. The two staff members I've been in contact with have also both been so helpful and nice. So far this experience has been really positive, so hopefully the job will also be a good experience for me.

On a different subject, the past 24 hours have also been really good for getting involved in art related things here, which as I mentioned is a massive priority for me. We were going to a private view last night at Platform Stockholm, and at the last minute I found out that there was another private view at Färgfabriken, which is just next door. We went to Färgfabriken first, and there were a couple of different shows there. The show that the PV was for was related to the fragmentation and "development" of urban spaces, and in particular we watched a really interesting film about Beirut, and the privatisation of the sea. This was a brand new concept to me, and something that I didn't even realise was possible. I was thinking about it for a long time after we left, and it was striking to see the perspectives of people in Beirut, and the changes that they had observed.
There was also an exhibition of sculptures by Julia Bondesson, and I enjoyed these even more. Each piece seemed to have its own character, these dead pieces of wood seemed to be so expressive. The rough way that the pieces were carved gave them a really interesting appearance. Each piece was very well made - they were rough but simultaneously refined.
I also really liked the way that the exhibition was set out - each individual work was presented in a unique way. Perhaps this factor helped to bring personality to the pieces. I enjoy exhibitions that are experimental in their presentation.
Next we went to Platform Stockholm, where the show concerned the themes of the body, loss, and artificiality. There were some abstract paintings I really liked that to me suggested bodily fluids. I think this is really interesting, as I think most people would associate bodily loss with amputation. 
I really liked the space at Platform Stockholm - I could see my work in that space. I'm really keen to see more shows there and see other possibilities for how the space can work.

Today I went to Kultuhuset to see work by Katrine Helmersson, which I really enjoyed. There were a lot of abstracted images of the body and body parts - I work mainly in portraiture, recently mainly images of body parts, so this was very interesting to me. The style was totally different from my own work, but I appreciate being able to see an alternative perspective. I'm also very into texture, and this show includes a variety of materials and textures, as well as some textile pieces, which are also of particular interest to me. The information about the exhibition mentions the work alluding to themes from Kristeva and Lacan, both of whom I studied in the last year of my degree. Having some understanding of this made the show even more interesting. I was not familiar with the artist before today, but now I'd be keen to see more of her work. 
So it's been a good 24 hours for me, and my only complaint is that many galleries in Stockholm seem to stay shut for extended periods of time. Or maybe I should take that as a positive that there are still so many exhibitions and spaces yet to discover.

It came and went

It snowed for the first time since we arrived, but has actually already melted away. I'm not really that keen on snow, or maybe just how my own country copes with snow, but on this occasion I was reminded of how magical it looks when it first starts to snow, before layers of ice develop or it melts into sludge.
There's a woody area near to our house, and it looked really beautiful covered in snow. There seem to be a lot of dogs living here too, and it was nice to see them being taken for walks covered in snow. Yesterday our time job hunting was punctuated by breaks outside to play in the snow like children. It made a nice change for me - I kept remembering that the alternative option was being in London.
I feel a bit less negative about snow now, but then this was the dry, powdery snow that it's difficult to slip on. I didn't expect it to melt quite so quickly - this time yesterday every surface outside was still covered in layers of snow. It snowed lightly but steadily throughout yesterday, and most of the night before.

On a different note, today I've had a serious lead about a job, one that exactly fits the kind of thing I was hoping to do here. I don't want to jink it, and should learn more soon, but for now I am hopeful.

A home in Stockholm

I had a really enjoyable day today, visiting some areas that we could potentially live in in the future. I already had a couple of ideas of suitable places but I've now seen some more. It's easier now that I know where I'll be working, but at least in Stockholm every train runs through T-Centralen, so it's not really difficult to make any journey on the tunnelbana.

Aside from that I already know I'd be happy to live in Södermalm - it's so central and there's so much going on there, it really would be an ideal location to get pretty much anywhere. I've been to Hjorthagen and Ropsten quite a lot, and this is also a nice area, although it's also very quiet and maybe not my first choice. I'm not necessarily expecting the perfect house immediately, and as I've discovered how difficult housing can be here I want to keep quite an open mind. 

As I'll be working in Östermalm I'm concentrating on the red line. My first stop was Gärdet, and I fell in love! There is a huge, beautiful park in Gärdet, and the area was really peaceful and green. It seemed very safe and quite quiet, but is only a few minutes on the train to T-Centralen, and even walking would be an option. The next train station, Karlaplan, is only at the other end of the park.
The blocks of flats were quite beautiful, and I noticed a couple of restaurants etc in the area. Transport would be really convenient, and also I met some people today in Gärdet, so may already know people in the area, which is a bonus. I've just looked on Blocket, and happily, flats are affordable here. I don't want to limit our options, but Gärdet would really be ideal.

My next stop was Aspudden, but I was less impressed here. The area seemed ok, there was a large flea market/boot sale going on, which was nice but the area was extremely busy, you could barely get down the street. I don't know how regularly this happens, or if the number of people was just because of the market, but I think it could get a bit frustrating if it was regularly that full of people. The market was interesting, there was a busker near the station, and there seemed to be a variety of other shops and restaurants. The location is also very convenient, so if it's not usually this packed with people I could definitely consider Aspudden.

Next I went to Midsommarkransen and walked to Telefonplan station from here, so I managed to get a good view of the area. In Midsommarkransen there are some beautiful winding streets, and this really appealed to me. The buildings are very beautiful too, and there seemed to be more art related stuff around Telefonplan. Konstfack is also located here, and I'd really like to do my masters there in the future. Midsommarkransen is kind of strange, as it has some industrial buildings but at the same time is pretty and peaceful, it's another area I'm quite keen on. It would take longer to travel from than Gärdet, but I don't think it's unreasonable compared to London travel times. Rent here is also really affordable.


 The red train line goes overground between Slussen and Gamla Stan, the view is beautiful and I wouldn't mind seeing that every day!

Finally I went to Hägerstensåsen, but I was less impressed with the area around here. There didn't seem to be much to it apart from trees, I found it pretty but a bit dull and it's quite far to travel to T-Centralen. There wasn't anything really wrong with it, I'd live there if there was no alternative, but it's definitely not my first choice.


If anyone can suggest any other areas I should visit before I go to England on Saturday I'm very open to suggestions!

A peaceful walk in the forest

I'm lucky enough to live only a few minutes walk from a large forest. I noticed it on Saturday evening on the way to a party in Kista, and yesterday I was feeling a bit fed up and decided to go for a long walk there. It was really beautiful, and other people were few and far between, which was definitely a positive at the time. Even though it's not far from main roads and traffic it was dense and so peaceful and quiet, and it was easy to forget that I was in the city at all.

I saw so many different types of mushrooms, and that is quite a big difference between the Nordic countries and England. Mushrooms are actually my favourite food, and I would have loved to have picked some, but unfortunately I have no clue what is and is not poisonous, so I just left everything alone. They were everywhere though, and they were beautiful to look at. I saw a deer, and as far as I remember that's the first time I've seen a deer in a natural setting like that. I also saw some information about a viking cemetery situated in the forest, and it was quite interesting to read about that.

The forest was so peaceful, and it was really nice to sit there and relax. I expect that later I will live in a different area of Stockholm, but I would happily travel to walk in this forest again. It was so green, and the sun was so bright. It wasn't even very cold, so I happily passed a couple of hours just wandering through. I really thought it was a shame that people who had been there having bonfires etc had left quite a lot of litter in places.

It's lovely to have such a beautiful area so close to where I live, and I hope to visit the forest again. It's definitely a good place to get some privacy and clear the head. The past couple of weeks have been quite stressful and emotional for me, and I think I probably really needed this time and space.

I'm even more keen to explore now, as I've decided to go back to England temporarily on 20th September. This situation is very difficult for both my boyfriend and myself, and more and more we feel that it makes more sense for me to go back for a short time until we can come back to Sweden together. I'm glad to be here, but I'm not completely happy being here on my own, and this will resolve the problem. It's not the original plan, but seems like the best way forward right now. We expect to be back here around December or January, and I think we'll both be much happier at that point. Coming to Sweden now was definitely worthwhile, else I never would have known how things would go, and I feel much more prepared for the future.