Balancing act

Yesterday we decided to explore our local area a little more, and went for a lovely walk by a very large frozen lake near to our house. It was so quiet and peaceful, everything so still. This is something I really appreciate about Stockholm after living in London for several years - there are so many quiet places here, even in central Stockholm there are areas where you can just sit in peace, and there's definitely nowhere like that in central London! I feel that Stockholm has a very good balance between liveliness, and more peaceful places. I had a chance to draw some pictures too - I haven't actually gone out sketching in a while, so that was really nice.
In the evening our flatmates suggested going for dinner at a restaurant they like very close to our house, so we did that and it was really nice. The waitress was so bubbly and cheerful, and repeatedly pointed out how young and beautiful I was, which I'm certainly not complaining about!

Since I found a job in this country I feel that balance is my biggest problem. Seeing as most emerging artists are obliged to support themselves with a day job I know that my problem is not unique, and it certainly isn't a new problem for me, it's been a constant issue in my mind since I graduated in 2012. However, up until now I was in London, where I had my life already set up, I had friends, I had plenty of art contacts, I knew my way around, and of course I was fluent in the language there! It definitely wasn't always easy to do everything that I wanted to, but I feel like it's much more difficult for me right now.
Whilst I was looking for work here I obviously had a lot of free time, and it was easier to do everything that I wanted to. Now I work five days a week, which I'm perfectly willing to do, but it obviously takes up a large part of my time. In the remaining time I have to try to fit in making art and looking for opportunities etc related to this, working on this blog and a novel that I'm writing, exploring my new home and getting to know Stockholm better, having a social life, which right now involves more effort because I don't know many people in Stockholm, so I need to make an effort to go out and meet new people, continuing to learn Swedish, and also having time to relax and have a private life with my partner.

Already I've had to really think about what my priorities are. Shortly before I found a job I got involved with a newly established advertising agency, who wanted a few hours of voluntary work per week, and were aiming for this to turn into full time employment for their volunteers in a few months time when they had a revenue stream. This seemed ideal whilst I was still job hunting, and I liked the prospect of this hopefully becoming a more creative day job in the future.
However, it became apparent that this would involve taking part in fairly long meetings on Saturdays, and that's not particularly appealing after working Monday-Friday. As I hadn't even started doing any work for those people, and already was struggling to fit everything in, having another commitment on my plate didn't seem like a good idea. I worried that doing this work to deadlines could mean that my own work would fall to one side, and that is much more important to me than working for free for someone else's benefit. So I dropped this idea, and I'm sure I'll feel pretty stupid if this company later becomes one of the biggest advertising agencies in the world. But I have to make my choices.
Recently I've started to become more efficient in a bid to fit everything in. I practice Swedish online on my way to work; if I have a little bit of quiet time at the end of the day I try to write if I can. I think the secret is trying to fit something in wherever possible - even five minutes is better than nothing at all.

I remember that an American artist I met during a residency in Iceland a couple of years ago told me that she tried to do small pieces of work, because it seemed much more manageable when she came home from working all day and then had to produce something. I've been keeping this advice in mind, because currently the main drawing I'm working on consists of lots of small drawings that will later be connected together to make a large scale piece of work. I think even aiming to work on one of these when I get home each day is a good strategy.
Stockholm is still new and exciting to me, so I'm obviously really keen to visit different areas and see new places, particularly galleries and art spaces that are brand new for me. At weekends it is really tempting to go out and explore, rather than concentrating on work or the more administrative side of my career. Perhaps I should keep in mind that we are not here for a short trip, we have plenty of time to go to new places, and we don't need to see everything this instant. I'm making friends and doing various things to help me meet new people, and hopefully when I have more of an established set of friends here, which is what is starting to happen now, things will be a bit easier. I hope that, as I settle more, and force myself to become more disciplined, it'll become easier to balance everything in my life.
Perhaps I also need to avoid beating myself up for not working or being active constantly, and keep in mind that I also need time to relax. Until I get to a position where a day job is unnecessary I think that this will be a constant issue in my life to some degree. I'm getting there, I'm making friends and art related contacts here, and my efficiency is definitely improving. Maybe I shouldn't expect to be superwoman. I think my life would be easier if we'd stayed put in London, but I'm certain my life would not be happier that way.