One year ago today...

One year ago today, and I can't believe that already it's so long ago, I came to Sweden to visit Heli, as part of a two week European tour visiting Stockholm, Amsterdam, Barcelona, and a failed trip to Andorra. A year ago if you'd told me that now I'd have been working full time in Stockholm for several months, that I'd live in a part of southern Stockholm I'd never even heard of at that point, I'd have a Swedish phone number and bank account, and would be semi-fluent in Swedish I'd think it was ridiculous! A year ago I went alone to a supermarket here to buy something to eat, and had to look at products with Finnish text on the packaging to be sure of what it was! A year ago I asked Heli to write down for me the Swedish for asking someone if they spoke English, and it took a couple of days of encouraging myself before I even managed to say those three words!

A year ago I was a bit fed up and frustrated with London, and decided a holiday would do me some good and get it out of my system. I didn't expect the opposite effect. I'd thought of how one day moving to Stockholm might be nice, but was not taking the idea seriously at all. I just expected to have a nice few days with my friend here before moving on. But over a few days, starting with National Day, which is this Saturday, I decided that actually I really wanted to come here. And why wait? I felt there was no reason that I had to live in London or England. And by the time I left Stockholm for Amsterdam I was heartbroken to be leaving, and was determined to be back soon. Here I am still.

Things have certainly not gone quite to plan. I rushed, thinking I knew it all about emigrating because I managed in Finland, didn't give myself enough time, and left in September after a few weeks because I really wasn't happy without my boyfriend. I didn't expect to go back to England for a few months, and it was frustrating at the time, but actually it was also a really happy time that I'm glad I experienced.

This time round has not been without problems, but has definitely been more successful. As my boyfriend pointed out yesterday, I have managed. I have made a life. I have a house, a job, and many more friends in Stockholm than I had a year ago. I know more than I did a year ago. It's not been easy all the time, but I've learned a lot.

I'm starting to feel quite ready to leave Stockholm now. It's a beautiful place, and I think an experience like this is always valuable, but Stockholm isn't the one for me. I would certainly still visit in the future, there are many people and places here that I want to see again. I have no definite plans for when I will leave, but I know I don't want to stay here long term. Just like in September, I'm not as happy as I could or should be.

It's strange to think that a year has passed since this all really began. And actually I think that the last year has been one of the most exciting and special years in my life, despite the ups and downs, for both reasons relating to Stockholm and reasons relating to other things. It's not been perfect, I'm not happy all the time, but it could certainly be worse. I'm not sure how much more time I have here, but I'll be sure to appreciate the time I do have until it's over.

Good/bad/beautiful day

Tomorrow I'm off to London! I'm quite excited to go home for a few days and see my friends. I had today off as well, and it was overall a nice day, but as always, not without its ups and downs.

The good news - I went to SEB and managed to open a bank account! Now that I've got into the banking system here I have to say I find it absolutely bizarre. In fact, whilst many things here are not what I'm used to, this is the first thing I've found completely impossible to understand.

First off, I was confused by the fact that the nearest branch to me in Globen was only open for 3 hours every day. Nevertheless, off I went, and when I explained that I just want to receive my wages and pay my rent the nice man at the bank asked me how I'd get the rent money into my new bank account. I said I would get it from the ATM and put it in the account so the payment could be made, which seemed fairly obvious. He then told me that only one branch in Stockholm handles cash! But it's a bank!

Anyway, the one and only branch that handles cash is in Sergels Torg, and as I had planned to go to an exhibition at Kulturhuset anyway it was no bother really to go there as well so I opened the account. Incidentally, the nice man told me that his best friend is English and he thinks it's sad how much foreign people struggle here. He told me to keep aiming for that personnummer and things will be much easier. It's nice to know that the average Swedish person agrees that things are unreasonably difficult for those who had the misfortune to be born abroad.

The other odd thing about banking in Sweden is that there is no standard system for generating account numbers. Each bank has their own system. I was wondering why my landlord's bank account number is twice as long as mine, and upon googling how the number should look I found that every bank has their own system. You might get to understand what your own bank does, but for other banks it's guesswork. I find this completely baffling. 

Then my day took a turn for the worse. I went to Sergels Torg, and knowing that the maximum amount you can withdraw from an ATM is 2000kr, I planned to use an ATM a few times to get enough for my rent, and a bit extra for when my bank card arrives. It should be here once I get back from London. Sadly it was not to be. It seems 2000kr is the maximum I can take per day, maybe partly because I'm withdrawing from an overseas account. So I never actually got to the Sergels Torg branch, and still had to pay my rent with ridiculous fees from my UK account. My war with them about the fees is ongoing, but at least now my wages will come into my Swedish account and I can save a little more. It's still frustrating, but I know I've made a small amount of progress.

I felt sorry for myself for a bit, and then went on to Kulturhuset. I have to say I really like it there, and really enjoy their exhibitions. I'm also able to see exhibitions there for free - I'm 25 years old, and those aged 25 and under go for free. I happen to look a bit younger than I really am, and every time I've told staff I'm 25 and asked to go in for free they've never asked for proof, so I'm probably going to be 25 years old for a while.

The current show is called "Asylum", and exhibits both art and fashion pieces. The theme seems fairly tentative in places, but there's a lot of interesting work there, and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed the mix of contemporary and older work, and there was work from less famous names, but also artists such as Salvador Dali. It's a really mixed show. The media is also very mixed - film, fashion, and sculpture. It's pretty broad so I think most people could take something from it, and for this reason I would recommend it.

After seeing the show I had some time to kill before going to the pub, so I went to the library and looked at the art section. I hadn't looked at this before, but I thought it was great. They have books in a variety of languages, there are comfortable places to sit, and they have a good range of books on art, fashion, photography, and design. I spent a while flicking through a really nice book about shoe design, it was quiet and peaceful, and I recommend it as a place to fill a bit of time.

So apart from one blip I had a pleasant day off work, and I'm looking forward to going on holiday tomorrow. It's getting late and I still need to pack my suitcase!

Thank you SEB!

It looks like my personal banking crisis may soon be over! I've just had a very welcome email from SEB's non-resident branch, and they've advised that if I am paying tax in this country and just want a basic bank account with a card and online banking I can open one at any regular SEB branch! Success! So I will be taking this email and all the evidence I have that I'm a tax payer, and opening an account on Monday. I'm very pleased, and hopefully this will save me some money.
Still no reply from my UK bank regarding their charges, but it's one less thing to worry about.

A reflection

This week there's been a lot to be happy about, finding a job and a place to live in one week is a bit special. As I still don't know a huge number of people in Stockholm I decided to invite everyone I do know out last night, and it was great. It made me think about our situation.

Five weeks ago we came to this country with nothing - no job offers or solid long term plans, nowhere to live long term, and we knew only a couple of people in Stockholm. Five weeks is not a long time, and I'm actually so proud of how I've done, and that already I'm in a position where I feel at home here, rather than feeling like a visitor or tourist. 

Although I lived in Finland for a year I was more nervous about coming here, probably because I'm now older and wiser, and more realistic about the difficulties of living abroad. In Finland I had a lot of good luck, and a lot of help from others, and I did worry I wouldn't manage this time round. I really do not want to live in England, so failing here would be such a massive disappointment. 

I'm so happy that we've started to really make a life here in a short space of time. Obviously it's still very early on, and things are not perfect yet, but I'm surprised at the progress we're making. I have a job, we have a place to live, which I can't wait to move to next week, and we have friends here. It's starting to become home. 

I'm keen to make Swedish friends, but I also like meeting people from a variety of countries and backgrounds. I realised last night that the people we count as our friends in Stockholm are all of different ages, nationalities, and backgrounds, including Swedish, but despite this everyone can be together without it being awkward or uncomfortable. I love that, and I feel lucky to already have people here I think of as friends. I'm used to having a lot of friends and contacts in London, so to suddenly be in a strange place where you know barely anyone can be lonely and depressing. There have been a couple of times when I've been lonely, but that's not really the case now.

Good luck comes in threes so hopefully very soon Kai will find a job or something else that he wants to do. I hope that our luck doesn't run out and we keep having as amazing a time as we've had so far. I've put in a lot of effort since we got back here, and it's so good to know that said efforts have paid off. I feel it proves that anything can happen if you try, and that the negative experiences I've heard about do not go for everyone. I feel that we have a future here, and I'm so happy.

Busy, brilliant week

I've been busy this week, mainly settling into my new job. I'm still adapting, but I'm enjoying it. As I work for an EU agency, and it's such an international environment, I don't know how much the workplace culture is influenced by Sweden, and how much by other places, but either way, there are some aspects that are brand new for me.

1.) Flexible hoursThere are certain hours of the day when I have to be in the office, but outside of these hours it's flexible, as long as I work enough hours in total. This is great, in particular because the Skatteverket opening hours are not very compatible with people who work usual business hours.

2.) Meetings
I've heard that meetings are very regular occurrences in Swedish workplaces; having meetings about meetings is not unusual. I've definitely experienced this during the last few days, and it looks set to continue.

3.) LunchLunch seems to be a much bigger deal here. My workplace has a canteen, as do numerous places nearby, and it seems more usual to have a proper hot meal at lunch time. Swedish law, I now understand, requires employees to take a lunch break, so there's no sandwiches at your desk here!

Obviously it's early days, but I'm enjoying it, and it is a bit surreal to think that 5 weeks ago tomorrow I arrived here with no job, and now things are totally different. Another big change is that yesterday I found somewhere for us to live for a few months! I'm so excited, especially as the house we've been living in since we got here last month has not been great. That's a story for another day. We were looking for another airbnb property, as we knew we wouldn't find somewhere to live by the end of next week. We found something suitable in Högdalen, only two stops from here on the t-bana, and when I explained our situation to the owner he told us he's going away for a few months until May, and offered to let us rent from him until then! This gives us a chance to relax for a bit, not immediately look for housing again. I'm genuinely amazed that I found both a house and a job within a week! I'm looking forward to moving next Friday, it'll be nice to settle in somewhere for a while, even if it's not really our own home. It really feels like everything is starting to come together here, and a bit more quickly than I expected. I'm starting to feel much more comfortable. I'm even more sure now that September wasn't the right time; this is the right time. I hope that our luck continues into the future, I feel so happy.

An excellent 24 hours

Woohoo! The past 24 hours have been really good for me, but the biggest piece of news - I got the job! I start on Monday, and it's such a relief because this means that the biggest obstacle has been surpassed, and everything should get a bit easier from now on. Since going to Bazaren I've been feeling a bit more negative - there seemed to be an implication from some sides that Swedish people don't trust foreign people to do the job properly, and this worried me a bit, but now I feel so much better.
I'm sensible enough to realise that things will not automatically be easy from now on, but this does make a big difference. I now qualify for a personnummer, and can start looking for a place for us to live. I could have started that previously, but I do understand that not many people will be keen to rent to a couple who've just turned up and have no steady income. Kai is still looking, but having one decent income between us takes the pressure off a bit.The most important thing is that finding this job enables us to stay in Stockholm. After reading about so many negative experiences I did worry that eventually we'd run out of options. I would absolutely hate to have to go back to England, so I'm really relieved. I realise this is just a start for us, but hopefully it's a good sign for our future. I do feel more confident now that we'll be able to build a successful life here.

In my time job hunting I've noticed that Swedish people/companies are extremely friendly and positive in comparison to England - even rejection emails are so pleasant that you almost don't mind! I'm going to be working via a recruitment company, and the two welcome emails that they sent to me were so enthusiastic and friendly that I already feel comfortable working with them. The two staff members I've been in contact with have also both been so helpful and nice. So far this experience has been really positive, so hopefully the job will also be a good experience for me.

On a different subject, the past 24 hours have also been really good for getting involved in art related things here, which as I mentioned is a massive priority for me. We were going to a private view last night at Platform Stockholm, and at the last minute I found out that there was another private view at Färgfabriken, which is just next door. We went to Färgfabriken first, and there were a couple of different shows there. The show that the PV was for was related to the fragmentation and "development" of urban spaces, and in particular we watched a really interesting film about Beirut, and the privatisation of the sea. This was a brand new concept to me, and something that I didn't even realise was possible. I was thinking about it for a long time after we left, and it was striking to see the perspectives of people in Beirut, and the changes that they had observed.
There was also an exhibition of sculptures by Julia Bondesson, and I enjoyed these even more. Each piece seemed to have its own character, these dead pieces of wood seemed to be so expressive. The rough way that the pieces were carved gave them a really interesting appearance. Each piece was very well made - they were rough but simultaneously refined.
I also really liked the way that the exhibition was set out - each individual work was presented in a unique way. Perhaps this factor helped to bring personality to the pieces. I enjoy exhibitions that are experimental in their presentation.
Next we went to Platform Stockholm, where the show concerned the themes of the body, loss, and artificiality. There were some abstract paintings I really liked that to me suggested bodily fluids. I think this is really interesting, as I think most people would associate bodily loss with amputation. 
I really liked the space at Platform Stockholm - I could see my work in that space. I'm really keen to see more shows there and see other possibilities for how the space can work.

Today I went to Kultuhuset to see work by Katrine Helmersson, which I really enjoyed. There were a lot of abstracted images of the body and body parts - I work mainly in portraiture, recently mainly images of body parts, so this was very interesting to me. The style was totally different from my own work, but I appreciate being able to see an alternative perspective. I'm also very into texture, and this show includes a variety of materials and textures, as well as some textile pieces, which are also of particular interest to me. The information about the exhibition mentions the work alluding to themes from Kristeva and Lacan, both of whom I studied in the last year of my degree. Having some understanding of this made the show even more interesting. I was not familiar with the artist before today, but now I'd be keen to see more of her work. 
So it's been a good 24 hours for me, and my only complaint is that many galleries in Stockholm seem to stay shut for extended periods of time. Or maybe I should take that as a positive that there are still so many exhibitions and spaces yet to discover.

More progress

It seems that this week is becoming quite a successful week for me! As mentioned yesterday, Kai and I have begun to make some new friends here, which I think makes a big difference to feeling comfortable in a place. This morning there has been another positive development for me.

The job hunt has not been going particularly well this week - neither of us have been finding many new opportunities to apply for, and this week I've mainly been sending off speculative applications. That's better than nothing, but the chances of actually getting a job out of it are much slimmer. It's been getting quite frustrating, but we can't lose hope. Whilst I was looking for new sites that might list suitable job opportunities I had a phone call from the recruitment agency I spoke to about a particular job last week, and I now have an interview for that job tomorrow morning! Hooray!

These things make me nervous anyway, but in this case I'm extremely nervous. Getting this job would obviously mean I can easily apply for a personnummer (you can read about the trouble that caused me in September here ), and will probably make househunting much easier because we will have a guaranteed income. We haven't even started househunting yet, because we can understand that if two recent immigrants with no job between them wanted to rent from you you'd probably say no. It's not often that the outcome of a job interview affects whether or not you can be treated equally to everyone else in a country, but that kind of is the case here. So no pressure.

Obviously I'm taking this situation very seriously, and the rest of today will mainly be for research about the organisation, interviews and workplace culture in Sweden. I've already worked out how to turn my greatest weakness into a positive point, and I'm trying to take a very positive attitude, but without getting my hopes up.

Realistically I know I could do this job and do it well, I just have to make sure I'm as prepared as I possibly can be. Luckily Heli has also had the experience of coming from another country for a job interview in Sweden, and has now been working in this country for several years, so she's in a good position to give me some tips. I'm going to try not to stress too much today - I don't want to be a nervous wreck tomorrow morning. Getting this job would help us both so much, especially in terms of me getting a personnummer etc. So far we've had a really successful week, we have plans to hang out with our new friends both tomorrow night and Friday night, so I just need to trust that this success will continue tomorrow morning. Wish me luck!

Making progress

It's been snowing quite a lot here over the past few days. I'm not sure how normal it is here, but the temperature seems to fluctuate quite a lot - it snows, melts a bit, snows a bit more, and goes on in this way - today is the first day in several days with no snowfall. It's quite different to my memories of winter in Finland - after the first snow that was pretty much it for the next 6 months.

Yesterday was a really good day for us. We finally got round to buying sim cards, and I had the whole conversation, which was obviously a bit more complicated than "Hej", "Nej", and "Tack", completely in Swedish, for both myself and Kai. It's only one thing but I was pleased afterwards that I'd managed it with no problems at all. I also feel more settled now that I have a working Swedish number and am no longer being charged large amounts of money to use my phone by my UK network.

Then in the evening we went out to a bar to meet a group of ex-pats from all over the world living in Stockholm. We looked at the Meet Up website - which I knew of but had never used before, and as one group I was interested in were meeting that evening we thought we would seize the day and go along. My thought was that in the worst case scenario we might not meet our new best friends, but at least it gets us out of the house, visiting a new bar, and socialising with others. 

As it was, the other people there were very friendly and welcoming, and we've been invited to a similar meeting this Friday. We met a lot of nice people, and there were also a few Swedish people there too. I'm an open minded person with friends from all over the world, but here I'm particularly interested to meet Swedish people and make some friends from this country. However, it's also really good to meet others who have moved here, and in most cases have more experience than we do of being here. I really enjoyed talking to people from lots of different backgrounds, who all ended up here in different ways. 

Even though Kai is here with me, I miss having friends around. When you live somewhere for a long time you do take for granted the fact that you have friends there and know your way around the place, here we're really starting from scratch again. I think having friends and a social life is really important, so hopefully this is the start of us integrating more.

After this experience I definitely intend to go to more meetings like this, and have joined some other groups on the website. One group I joined is a women's art group, who will be meeting to see the Louise Bourgeois exhibition at Moderna Museet. Obviously I'm keen to see that, and the people in the group have been really welcoming so far. 

However, I joined a language exchange group that frankly is not very appealing because their meetings seem so strict and structured - I was looking at an event for Swedish and English, and it didn't seem very friendly at all. Going into a group of people you don't know can be nervewracking, and I'm not keen to join an event that seems a bit hostile! My Swedish ability is a lot more advanced than Kai's, and reading the description of the event made me feel like they'd chuck him out or something if I took him with me. Maybe it's only the person running that specific event who takes such a seemingly harsh attitude - hopefully I can find something similar that seems to have a more welcoming atmosphere. Any kind of social event should surely be fun, not making you feel like a schoolchild. 

Thankfully the group of people we met last night were all great, and even if we only see those people regularly in the context of that group it still means we've met some new people and are visiting more places in Stockholm. I'm looking forward to going out on Friday, hopefully that experience will be just as enjoyable.